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Instead, she felt terminally single and undateable. Before we even were able to address her action plan for real life dating and dating websites , we needed to address her insecurity. We started by working on her limiting beliefs, particularly the idea that she was less than anyone else because of her race. Eventually, this black butterfly came to see herself as the shining beauty that she is internally. Then she was able to put her best foot forward externally with a profile that reflected her charm, grace, and inner loveliness.

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She says he makes her feel special, but this is just the icing on the cake as she knows in her core that she is worthy and deserving of all good. Feeling invisible is a common refrain that I have heard from black women of all backgrounds. Some feel as though the men they are interested in often overlook them.


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There is a line between preference and prejudice, but again, you cannot control anyone else. The cure for invisibility is to get visible.

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As with my coaching client, work on your inner sense of self-worth first, and then you can present yourself to your potential mates as your best self. Well, with online dating this means that a profile revamp is in order.

The results of my professional perusal of the photos of black women online is dismal. I see beautiful women who are not putting their best foot forward. Some post pictures with their kids, passport or business photos, or have profiles that exclusively feature pets. For the bashful, there is often no photo at all.

Then there are those pictures of you with other people. You have what appears to be an ex-boyfriend cropped out or a bevy of best friends where I have to work to discern which beauty is you.

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This is a disaster. Your ideal picture should look like you would look on a first date.


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Be sure to include one close up shot and one full length body shot. You want to see what he looks like head-to-toe, right? Be sure that the photo is up-to-date and taken within the past year. If you have lost or gained weight or have dramatically different hair, it is time for new pictures. Show yourself in a variety of scenarios. As they say, a picture is worth 1, words. Strike a balance between overtly sexy and looking like a nun. I'm a chef so food is my passion. As much I love cooking and also love to go out to restaurants.

In my free time i l I am a bubbley fun person to be around. I enjoy watching movies going out for dinner with friends and family. I also love to cook, read novels, shopping and enjoy a good laugh. Im not much of a show off or a talker but I have a great personality when you get to know me. I love most things.. Beautiful Soul I am a bubbly and sociable woman who is searching for companionship, love and a long term serious relationship.

My hobbies are going to the spa, theatre, cooking, eating out, reading inspirational bo I am a nice lady who is a hard worker, confident and yet warm and loving.

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I am a principled person who can let her hair down. I love to travel, socialise and yet I enjoy reading a good book in the com Life is for the living Friendly, sociable, fun loving, sincere, independent, affectionate, kind, intelligent woman looking for my soulmate! I am originally from Ghana, lived in U. I am God fearing a I am easy going, kind, caring, smart with a great sense of humour