Tips for sending a message on a dating site

The more informal standard greetings: There are many words on the effective end of our list like zombie , band , tattoo , literature , studying , vegetarian yes!

3 ways to say hello to someone online

Talking about specific things that interest you or that you might have in common with someone is a time-honored way to make a connection, and we have proof here that it works. Awkward , sorry , apologize , kinda , and probably all made male messages more successful, yet none of them except sorry affects female messages. A lot of real-world dating advice tells men to be more confident, but apparently hemming and hawing a little works well online. It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening.

11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses

It could be that women like guys who write mumbly. Mentioning your religion helps you, but, paradoxically, it helps you most if you have no religion. These are the religious terms that appeared a statistically significant number of times. Atheist actually showed up surprisingly often times per 10, messages, second only to mentions of christian and ahead of for jewish and for muslim. But ideally you should just disbelieve the whole thing.

First Message Strategy #2: Connect On Common Ground

The program then aggregated results by phrase before presenting the data. No one at OkCupid read any actual user messages to compile this post.

How to write that first online-dating note

Written by Christian Rudder. Those three elements are crucial if you want to get a response to your online dating opener. Weekday evenings are generally best — many women unwind from a long day at work by firing up a dating app while catching up on Netflix. According to Nielsen , activity on both OkCupid and Tinder peaks at 9 pm, and usage starts to rapidly decline after 10 pm.


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  6. 1. Make sure your profile is complete before you message anyone!

On Bumble, the real action starts a little earlier, with activity peaking at 6 pm. And if you happen to find yourself stuck inside due to inclement weather like a blizzard, hurricane or rainstorm, put these first message examples to good use. NBC News did a little investigating, and found that bad weather goes hand in hand with increased activity on dating sites and apps.

In many cases, the increase was pretty dramatic. Send her a light-hearted follow up message like this one:. The more messages you send, the more desperate you look.

2. Create an intriguing opening line

Women are too smart to fall for them. Not only do copy and paste messages work , but we get incredible results for our clients with them. Other industry experts recognize the wisdom of the copy and paste method as well.

3 Risk-Free Messages to Make the First Move Online

And even if a woman calls you out on sending a template message, so what? And many intelligent women recognize the wisdom of using them, like this one who weighed in on a Quora forum discussion:.

How to Write Your First Online Dating Message

Nothing kills your online dating game quicker than being dull. You have to keep her attention every step of the way, and build attraction with every message. You can skip all that stress, and go straight to the dates. Our online dating experts handle your profile, your photo, and all that tedious back-and-forth messaging.

All you do is show up for the dates! Click here to find out more.