ISTJ doesn't want a rocky relationship, or really, rocky anything. They like their affairs in an orderly fashion, not having problems with work, family, or their hobbies. These two will get each other on a gut level, and will enjoy having someone that doesn't completely mirror them. Neither are terrible at either kind of T or F rational -- they can both use feelings and thoughts evenly. Of course, they may have a preference for one or the other, but it isn't near as drastic as the gap with intuition and sensing. It isn't always easy dating someone with complete opposite dominate and inferior functions, but it might be easier for sensing and intuitive types to get along than having an opposite feeling-thinking dynamic.
Having feeling and thinking at the top makes for a more verbose person, whether arguing or fleshing out their emotions. Intuitives and sensors tend to be It's because they need to gather information, not just project it. Extroverted sensors and intuitives try to spark a stimulus in order to gather information and understand it. This can be helpful for introverted information gatherers as it will help pose questions and bring things to light. Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.
I like him a lot and I do think he feels the same. Although I am transparent with my feelings and emotions to him but I cannot do it full blast because I need him to commit with me first. I need commitment and security from him, so even though I attract and connect well with him, even though I know I affect him in ways he cannot control, I cannot compromise my values. It's either you take me whole or you will not have me at all. I am extremely loyal and extremely passionate. I can be extremely strong-willed also, extremely sensitive and extremely stubborn, but I love with all my heart.
I am able to sacrifice and compromise for the betterment of my love ones, I am also logical at times when I really take time to analyze situations and write my plans. So when it comes to the man I want to spend my life, I have to make sure he is stable and can be committed to me.
I have been in love with my childhood friend i think hes an istj and im an infj. I don't know, i just happen to love him. I don't like to be touchy or helpful to much people, but to him i would go out of my way to do errands and small chores for him lol. He is a touchy person while, i dont like people invading my personal space.
But after a long time, Ive gotten used to his.. If your gut is telling you something is off, you really need to listen to that. You could potentially have cold feet, but outweigh the pros and cons. How old are the two of you? Is a more serious commitment too soon? Do you have any major red flags?
An INFJ usually doesn't have a good feeling in the gut because of a red flag, so don't ignore it. Take the time to explore it. I have a question I have left him several times but we ended up back togheter because I couldn't bear it seeing him so hurt Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. HubPages and Hubbers authors may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others. To provide a better website experience, pairedlife.
What do you think of this pairing? Information Gatherers This pairing is good if one person needs someone up in the air and the other needs someone who is grounded. When it seems to be abstract, bizarre, or theory based -- let the INFJ take the wheel. They can creatively get to a proper solution. They are empathetic and make for great counselors. Go on quiet dates, not loud ones with too much variety that gets you both distracted.
Too much stimulus can be the bane for introverted information seekers; they'll enjoy the date, but they might not be getting a direct dosage of who you are. Don't be afraid that your relationship progress might be slower than other couples. You have personalities that don't like to rush and screw everything up into a big, nasty, and prolific mess. The INFJ wants to be enjoyed. Keep asking questions to try to understand. It's okay if either one of you are shy.
An INFJ needs to be comfortable that people have pasts. Those pasts do not necessarily effect you. If you feel in your gut that things are not right, then don't hesitate to break up. If you're not feeling that gut feeling, give the person a chance. ISTJ personalities will grow on you more and more. INFJ is most likely to be a psychic personality. They can see and understand things that don't come easily for others. Questions must be on-topic, written with proper grammar usage, and understandable to a wide audience. Hi I have a question I only knew about it when I got the walking paper. My brother has the same tendency.
He saw me as a slacker since we were children. If you want to be with an ISTJ, you have to be prepared to yield to his wish more often than not not saying his wishes would be bad or not beneficial to the relationship. INFJs can be a wonderful wing man. Last edited by chanteuse; at Necrilia thanked this post. Last edited by jamaix; at Never worked or appealed to me, for reasons listed above. Need an intuitive partner personally. Shea , Necrilia and Candy Apple thanked this post.
Sorry it took me so long to respond.
Want to add to the discussion?
As I stated above my husband and I have been married for over 30 years. One thing that I think has aided my husband and I greatly is the fact that we share core values. So we are on the same page already about most things. My husband INFJ dislikes keeping things the same, he likes to explore new ways to get there.
Sometimes this means it takes an extra 5 minutes or so to get there. Sometimes it means we get lost. This use to drive me ISTJ crazy because I could not fathom why you would want to take unknown paths or those that were less efficient.
[ISTJ] ISTJ and INFJ
It took me awhile but I've realized that it isn't the end of the world if we get turned around, or it takes an extra 5 or 10 minutes to get there. I just need to take a deep breath, sit back and enjoy the ride. I know he'll get us there eventually.
This has been a bit of a problem area for us but we do much better now than we did in our early years. My husband INFJ has a tendency to read between the lines when there are no lines to read between. There have been hurt feelings because he assumed things that I never said nor thought. I am not the best at telling him when he has done something that hurt my feelings.
I haven't always done a good job of telling him what I need from him. I would imagine these might be things that many introvert couples have to regularly guard against. My husband is actually more concerned with order than I am. I can't stand to be in an environment of complete chaos, but clutter piles here and there don't bother me. As long as I know where things are I'm fine. My husband dislikes my clutter piles. He also dislikes the fact that I often leave clutter in the car as well.
He doesn't make a big fuss about it, but if I don't take care of it in a certain amount of time he'll go do it and then I feel bad about him cleaning up after me. This is actually good though because it causes me to push myself harder to maintain order than I would if he were indifferent to it. As a general rule my husband tends to make up his mind rather quickly and is a bit impulsive. I am at times very slow to make up my mind. We balance each other out. I help him avoid making an impulsive decision that he'll regret, and he helps me arrive at a decision in a more timely manner.
Differences here were pretty great in our early years, but not so much now. He was much more openly affectionate than I was. This subject came up in conversation shortly after we were married.
The Case for an INFJ and ISTJ Romance
We were discussing ways to improve our marriage and one of the things he pointed out was that he wished I was more affectionate. Basically I had to learn how to be a more touchy feely person. I don't know if this is an INFJ thing or if it is because his love language is touch. I'm sure there is much more, but I'll stop here. I think it could work for us. For other reasons beside typology, my ISTJ bf also likes to try new things, like movies or shows or food. Fi is the 3rd in an ISTJs stack. Since one is external and the other is internal, they can be very different. I have learned to hone my Fe better though in terms of learning how to say things to others as opposed to how things are said to me.
I'm different from your husband regarding clutter piles. My bf says he's not too concerned about it. I could really use my bf's methodical decision making as I can sometimes fall prey to gullibility around salespeople. WamphyriThrall and Grad thanked this post. By Deviruki in forum What's my personality type? Bookmarks Bookmarks Digg StumbleUpon del.