I could never use a man for his money. But not willing to settle down in a place of my own yet. Looking for the right area. I can love s a man with or without any money at all. But i am 54 years young. Someone that is the exact opposite of being after his money. If I found a worthy very poor guy to love. I dont want to be a sugar momma. And am not looking for a sugar daddy. Just a nice established man. Look me up for more info. And good luck to you all. As for me I want rich old man that can take care of me, a man that I will give all of me when is around.
Why would a rich man be bad without money? A nice guy with money is the same as a nice guy without money. If I am seriously that lonely, I can always go get a pet. People are so shallow. Id rather be with a rich man than a poor man. Any woman who says otherwise is lying to themselves. Actually, she is the one who usually pays for everything. She seems to be madly in love with me O. With that said though, a lot of money can cause problems just as much as not enough money can… just different set of problems.
If pets can fulfill your desire for a SO, then awesome! Meghan, I have a similar mindset as you. I can always find something new to work on if a door is really truly closed. Emily-I understand that girls want to be with a guy that is financially secure. It is easier to maintain a good relationship when there is even one less stressor to worry about.
However, I make girls earn their own money if they want something. If they want to buy a new car or a new pair of shoes, then she has to save her money to get it or build a new income stream to pay it off. Additionally, any assets that I have and bank accounts are left in my name only. Financial Samurai-I think pets are a great alternative to companionship for me. I do agree with you though, pets can be a pain to have to keep clean.
But pets are a lot nicer than the alternatives even if it means that I have to clean up more after them. Pets are great to have. Maybe you can live the rest of your life without someone to love, someone to love you, someone to hold at night and listen and be there for you at your time of need etc etc. I never thought about finding a guy primarily because he was rich.
I was more concerned about making a career for myself and being able to make my own money because relationships are not guaranteed and I knew I would need to have money of my own to be able to survive. Insightful points in this post. I can see how a lit of rich people are self made and are very business focused.
I think it just motivated you to work harder to be financially independent. But also the countless private inquiries I have from women asking me how and whether I can introduce them to single rich men. Just giving audiences what they want. Not creatively enough, it seems! There are many interesting points made in this article about wealth and time and lifestyle. Not so much mention about love and spirituality. Anyway my late Grandmother who grew up during the depression and had a happy and successful marriage with a man from similar circumstances knew I was a romantic.
And any normal woman or man knows how to take it from there. I think most of the advice here can also apply to how you can keep your partner, most women tend to forget that they must also have a life of their own when in a relationship, and not to be so clingy. Well, I am neither rich nor a woman looking for a rich man. Maybe they just want a man that will keep up with their lifestyle. Do rich women marry other rich men? I think rich women are often surround by other rich people in general.
Therefore the chances of marrying at the same level is much higher. Women really need equals or richer men. Did you collect these just from your experience, Sam, or was it from somewhere else? Begone, treacherous gold digger! I have the same feeling over looking good. I disagree with the ridiculous premise of this article.
Who says that women are looking for rich men, specifically, anyways? I have friends, in fact, who make so much money that their husbands choose to be stay-at-home dads! My sister married a rich man, and she spends most nights at home and deals with all the child issues because he is always at work. I would rather be home with my teacher husband.
That makes rich men seem so shallow: It is because he was creative, passionate, hardworking, problem solving that made him his fortune. Is that so bad? I agree that does make rich men seem shallow and is probably a generalization. I just watched Queen of Versailles this week, so I am a bit biased at the moment. However, I also think the title of this post makes women seem very shallow. I know there are lots who look for a rich husband to make their dreams come true, but it is kind of a slap in the face to those of us who are trying to be entrepreneurs and earn our own way.
Should we ignore the plight and desire of others and only see our point of view? So many different people have different wishes. I think we should be more open to topics to understand people. It just turns out that way if the husband is less motivated about working or making money than the wife is. Oh if you could read my e-mails from women and look at the random search terms that hit Google analytics.
There are many more women wondering than you believe. I hope one day the majority of women are breadwinners in the family. It would sure reduce stress related illnesses in men! Time for women to whip men in shape! Start the movement Holly. And start on Greg first! Most men I know are lazy as hell while their wives coordinate nearly every part of their lives. AS IF washing his own clothing should be considered some sort of gift to me.
A must read for all women with stay at home men! If the woman is the breadwinner, they think they are so smart to get a woman to do that.
They may disguise it by saying they are so lucky, etc. It was so easy to get ahead with a little application, but to make himself feel like he was in control and behind it all, he was a slob and abusive to me, and then he could also blame me for no sex. He dumped me and claimed all our property no character at all. I did check him out with people who knew him and the family and they all gave him the A-1 rating for being a good guy. But I was vindicated later when friends reported the second and third wives were abused in the same way.
Never mind, I left and never looked back. As for marrying a rich man, here is my experience. I dated a lot of wealthy and extremely rich men over the next 15 years and then realized I just did not want to compromise in any way. I like the idea of a compatible partner though. But there is no way I would marry a rich man without character or one who spent all the time on business. That is addiction or a preference, not a requirement to make money. I know enough wealthy and extremely rich men and women to know that the smart ones do not spend all their time on the phone or away.
They take a lot of time to enjoy life. If they are into you and vice versa, they have plenty of time to pay attention on a long term basis. The richer you are, the more your money makes money without you doing very much. In fact, I am rich enough to do that solo. While my friends work their asses off in business or renovating houses and also take much bigger financial risks, I relax while my money does the work with far less risk. Sam, I like your comment about wanting companionship and laughs from a partnership.
What makes a person physically attractive is energy, a smile, meticulous grooming, nice clothes, health and fitness, etc. What makes them a viable partner is character, being interesting and happy, mutual interests and goals, humor, intelligence, etc. As much as I hate the idea of this article, I know there are entire websites of women looking for a sugar daddy, and rich men wanting companionship. Weird how nobody believes women are looking for wealthy men and vice versa. And let me clarify my statement above. Money is a factor. Everybody despises people who marry others for money.
On the other hand, if the rich party is older, he may have to resort to his wealth to do some attraction for him, which is sad. Choosing a partner that can provide a secure future is all just part of the natural selection process…but, if you are singling out rich dudes or sugar mamas you are destined for eventual misery. Wealthy means having enough family, friends and cash to be satisfied and live a rewarding life….
Of course it is rational…just like it is rational for men to go after fit women with large breasts and shapely bottoms since nature has programmed us that they give they highest probability for our offspring to survive and prosper. I know rich men married to large breasted shapely women with no kids. The wife earns a lot of money too. Women like to know that they can attract men and personally, I like dressing very classy and I do enjoy most the high end of life. I still think it is important for me to work part time despite having a man in my life who has lots of money.
That is not what attracts me the most- it is more the caring, loving and affectionate side — of course the financial situation helps however I am fully aware of the dangers that money can bring. I agree with this instinct you speak of. We all want pleasure, comfort, and security. My father told me this.
I enjoy real men. Men who are comfortable with themselves. I often see that the matching of rich men and women looking for money and indeed vice-versa primarily for the reasons of money is one of the worst possible matches for a relationship.
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Whenever you see a big guy and a skinny pretty young girl people presume he has money. Do you think a guys that finds the exceptional woman the first time, if he gets divorced looks for a dumber one? I must admit, out of all your posts these relationship type articles are the weirdest to read. Seems that most have a bit of a gold-digger slant to them. Really enjoy your pf posts. I would say your personal relationship articles hurts the credibility of this blog.
Could you explain why? I find the dynamics of relationship and money fascinating and many people have emailed me and searches for these answers in private before. Why do you think some people want to restrict what I can say and are so stringent? What else would you like me to do for you? I like that this post gets it out of the way. Especially if the woman wants kids. I think a lot of you guys are completely forgetting that fact. Only women can have kids, so if a woman wants to be rich or at least have enough money to never worry about money again and have kids and actually be there for them , what is she meant to do?
Men will never need to worry about this in the same way women will, even if you say you will happily be a stay-at-home dad. Well, fine, but what if the woman wants to be a stay-at-home mum? I also do not want to be one of those workaholic women who only see their kids after work. Women want to find rich husbands because of the need for kids.. Did the couple ever talk about their ambitions, dreams and future life? Were kids a definite yes, no or maybe? Then, money can come into play, as well as resent over lack of it.
As far as the question of what can a woman do if she wants to have plenty of money to support her and her kids.. And then adopt children? I may be missing something, but that seems a little unreasonable…. Well, the reason it seems like the burden is on the MAN to make money is because, last I checked, most men are not very interested at looking after kids. Especially in Asian countries, most of the men do not want to bother with kids at all and dump it all on the woman.
Sure, in an ideal world, a woman should be able to make her fortune and also have enough time to date, get married and have kids. Unfortunately, the problem is time. To switch roles and suddenly be a stay at home mum and not worry about money anymore.. Of course young women fantasize about having money and spending it more than having kids. But despite what these women say, thoughts of kids will come up eventually.. So thats not the bargain you want. But thats the whole point. The women in question are not looking for you.
What makes you think a financially well off person would not want a younger spouse and kids? So its back to what you said; good communication, and knowing what you want. In this case, a wealthy guy who wants to be the breadwinner and provider. There is nothing wrong with that, just like there is nothing wrong with a woman that wants to have kids.
Not adopt kids when she is too old to properly take care of them, but to have her own biological children when she is young enough to enjoy them. Or are he and his finances just the means to a quicker end kids?
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Or is this only if he does an inadequate job of loving you? Just not usually a personality trait of someone successful. To be rich, you have to control the most coveted and most squandered asset in the world. I talk with are under, say, I will probably notice that change when it starts taking place, which is COOL!!! Something else to look forward to. I for one really appreciate the guts and honesty Sam has for writing about such topics. Being able to go out on a limb on a topic where so many women and men think about but are too afraid to address provides huge credibility in my mind.
Here you are complaining about credibility? Give me a break.
I work with a few thousand brave young men and women who deploy to the desert every day, that takes guts. True, I have no blog and am a consumer of PF blogs only, a point not lost on me and that I freely give to Sam backup a couple posts and read my comments , however, I call bullshit when I see it Janey. I even show my ugly mug on postings. What else you looking for? Thanks for giving me the green light to go ahead and write a lot of affiliate posts Chris! I really do appreciate it. Going through the dating scene now I can perfectly related to all of your points above.
Gotta admit that it is not easy to find your better half so instead I am focusing to be a better me. Sorry for the breakup Hiro. Better earlier than later as I try to always think. Good tactic focusing on a better self. In response, a banker calls this a bad business deal and a depreciating asset. I never knew there was a response from the girl. Very interesting…thanks for sharing. Although after reading the response…it makes me think that the whole thing was a prank.
Still a fun read though. I love them both, but growing up I knew I never wanted to be my mom. Anyways, good advice for single women.
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I think there comes a point in most of our lives where a successful man becomes more attractive to us than a pretty man. Maybe this happens at about Ahh, a beautiful life with a lack of autonomy. What a predilection of sorts. To be autonomous is glorious. It is why so many long to quit their jobs and do something on their own. Wise words on there comes a point. It was a tear jerker. Hawaiians really throw the best weddings — so beautiful and fun.
They embody true love. Certainly one way to look at it. At the end of the day, money is money but we appreciate our time together and building wealth together. On a side note, your post reminds me of Eddie Murphy, back in the day, as he was always talking about wanting a woman who would want to be with him because of him and not his money. It means true love.
That you were lucky to find each other so soon and never really cared about money despite running a personal finance site. A level headed response. May I ask why you think some have taken offense to this post? Does it undermine people? Because from all the conversations and inquiries this topic seems highly interesting to women and men.
I wonder, though, is your article based on pointers from successful gold diggers, or from rich men knowing what they are looking for? Because, well, I could probably give you some pointers from real successful gold diggers. I hail from the land of gold diggers, where competition is fierce the above list is not enough. In another life, I sort of…was one. Until the day I fell in love with a poor guy who was the love of my life and I decided that I had all the tools to become wealthy on my own.
I wanted the respect that came with earning it all on my own. It seems like nowadays that would be the consensus. They would say so because they were never in a similar situation, never had been presented with a such a choice, and think the choice would be so logical, so easy. But it is weird sometimes, to remember who I used to be.
What I used to look like. The keys to the mansion and Ferrari I used to have. Seeing people on TV and magazines that I used to have dinner with. While the new people around me fantasize about that life and saying they would drop everything for it. The same people would be so quick to tear me apart if I ever told them who I used to be though!!!
I suppose this is why I feel ambivalent about the subject. But I suppose for the women who really want to lock down a rich dude, I can advise. It would be fun to talk about it like that. I never really have before. I think I know exactly how you feel. It must also feel annoying to be discredited based on your looks. How awesome does it feel to make it on your own yeah?
The article is based off my personal thoughts and experiences as well as insights from women who have explicitly told me this is their goal. Anyway, Sam, you did it again. I actually did not have a method I could share and nothing I did or what happened to me can really be replicated. I had a genuine connections with them! You said your goal was to incite introspection and you have done just that. Forcing myself to think about it was better than therapy.
I also wanted to mention that I think that in general, your article is good relationship advice period. Not just for women who want a rich guy, but for any woman who wants any guy. Most guys think the way you describe in your article! I dated a rich man for 7 months. I was not interested in him at the start.
I am self employed, and put 2 kids through college. I run my own life. Then I fell for him….. He was very good to me, we connected on every level… Then the magic day came… I had a bump in the road with my business, and was feeling emotional leading up to this day. The day I asked him to help me financially because I needed it is the very day he suddenly broke it off…. I never asked for a thing, I pay for my own possessions etc. I was shattered that he did not have my back….. Meanwhile I am here giving him my time, love and attention, moving my schedule to suit his corporate schedule as we would never see each other or find a connection otherwise.
He agreed and was thankful that I would do this. It was the first time I really put a man first…. Yikes, sorry to hear about him not having your back. In fact, it would be my honor if you were my lady. I was and still am trying to find answers, researching, reading the mentality behind it. I mean could he be so insecure to think that I could not love him for him? And I did not appreciate not having my back the most…..
When a regular guy would and did help in a minute flat…. Maybe he grew up extremely poor and has fears of going back. It is tough to say. Sometimes, the more you make the stingier you become. Even if your kids are like dying or you have to live on the street. This is SO important. I know because being someone who came from no money to suddenly making money, all my poor friends seemed to suddenly want to borrow money. Hence why, I mention this. If you do it right, they will happily hand money over without you ever needing to ask for a penny.
Can a wealthy man marry another wealthy woman. I am considered over ambitious and according to my parents, my overambitiousness is unhealthy for a lady like me because they think I ll never get married. They say men will be afraid of me. It depends more on personality and appearance imo. I think wealthy women are great! The article made me laugh. Where does your experience come from? Some of the advices as I think are exactly the opposite of what the woman should do.
When I tried to show interest at dating sites and asked men questions about their jobs — they just disappeared or avoided answering. If the woman goes away for 3 months as it was adviced to follow her goals or goes away to parties alone with friends all the times — I doubt any man, not only a rich man, will be happy with, when she returns back no wonder if she finds some substitute at her place.
But if some less atractive woman passes by in short skirt and high heels she is still looked at. One important thing was missed, rich men want only women under 30 or under 25, if you are older than that the chances are deminishing increasingly. It seems these advices saying that the woman should be independent to attract a man concern the middle class men which are well off. Second, communication skills are really important speaking, writing in shorter paragraphs, etc.
I think you need to work on that if you speak close to the way you write. I agree with nearly every thing in this article and find it spot on. For my case though I disagree that money makes me feel more attractive. I want her to want me for my hardworking ethics and I seek that in a woman mostly as well. My daughter is a pretty young lawyer from a middle class family and is married to a handsome young, rich doctor from a wealthy family. All things being equal, what seemed to charm him the most was that, although she had dated many men over the years, she had only been intimate with one man before him.
He was actually quite sexually active before he met my daughter which is why she insisted on std testing before they were intimate! Thanks for sharing that there are guys out there who see the worth of reaching for the apples at the top of the tree. I met a rich guy a week ago , he is really handsome and all. He started talking dirty with me on our chats and i played along.
He then suggested that we meet in his office and have some fun , i told him that i really like him but i am not that kinda gal. He started telling me about how he has taste , class in women and has dated a lot of celebs and travelled the world. I felt so bad. He even said that difficult women turn him off. Now i am in a dilemma. I really like this guy but i dont want to compromise my values for that. What should i do …. What you should really do is tell him to back off, show no weakness.
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I never dated a rich guy but I dated a guy who came from a former rich family, meaning he was raised in a rich environment. That is SO laughable, he got two cars, paid college tuition, several loans and his mother and sister are always there to aid him in food and clothes, a free roof over his head into his mid twenties. How insightful but I have a question, FS. I believe wealthy people tend to be savers that live ridiculoulsy below their means. I do free clubs and activities, which just reflect a cross-section of society. So… where are they really? Sounds like they are, like me, at the office working late on their own.
Thank you for the article. Apart from providing the very obvious tips it also gave a huge insight to the life of the wealthy — how they think and what they value. And how to think like the wealthy. Made the rich more human. That it offers choices and experiences and satisfaction from life.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and I hope you find someone you love, if not already. Once I had a short relationship with a Rich boy who was 4. Then I dumped him because I got to know he is a flirty. But we are still good friends and he still appreaciate me. At that time what I understood is for a Richman what is more important is if you will accept him even without his money.
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This boy I met was the only son of a rich dad. So he mostly attract women for his money. But if you can appreaciate him for himself , he will fall for you more than anyone else. And of course Richmen like independant women. If you can show him you do not want his money, but only him that will be a big plus. Hi, got to this post because I am finding myself in a similar situation. I met him at a conference and I was my friendly self.
He had the sincerest smile and I found him interesting. I was surprised that he invited me for dinner afterwards. By the way, he is 22 years older than me. When we met, he automatically concluded that I was older because of my position in the industry. He would text me each morning when he wakes and at night before he sleeps…and would call me at least once a day.
It feels wonderful but I am scared. Of what, I am not sure He is usually formal when we meet. But can get free with his emotions in texts. He has invited me for an overnight stay in one of his beach houses as his guest but I have not yet obliged him. I feel it is too soon. Hang around at the affluent areas and clubs of the city. Go for art fairs, horse races, polo matches, high-end country clubs, upscale charity events, and similar places that are bound to have the privileged guests.
Now, to get into these places, you may need to have a few contacts that can help you with the entry. When it comes to high-end bars, we suggest to keep a time slot of in the evening. Take a girlfriend along with you, wear some classy attire not too flashy and have a good time. If you manage to display your beauty, confidence, and subtle sensuality with that friendly smile, there are high chances that you might catch a worthy attention, and someone offers to sponsor your drinks! If you wish to be more than his arm candy, then your first impression should put it straight across his face that you are among those they call 'beauty with brains'!
Don't act way too prissy, but make sure you don't fall all over him way too easily, as well. Be confident, firm, put forth that you have a mind of your own, and you're not going to drool over him just because he has money. Ask him what he does. To educate yourself on these subjects, subscribe to a national magazine, and learn the intricacies of these high-end hobbies that rich guys seem to admire. You can't force yourself into it, do it with genuine interest. If everything you do and say eventually leads to 'money', darling you are surely going to be treated like a gold digger.
If you're hot, the guy might just take you out to some expensive places, sleep with you until he's bored, and then forget that you even existed. If you don't want that to happen, don't do or say anything that makes him suspicious of your intentions. If he tries to show off initially, tells you about his property, his collection of cars, his 'I-don't-give-a-damn-about-money' talks, don't widen your eyes that show pure greed, as if you've hit a jackpot!
Try to change the topic, rather ask him about his hobbies, his friends, his passion. Show that you're least bothered about his wealth, and you're more interested in the kind of person he is. By this, we don't mean that you reciprocate and take him to yet another expensive restaurant or pub. These are the things that he's had enough of already! Make things a little different. Perhaps once in a while you can cook his favorite dish for him, and invite him to your place for some 'homely' candlelight dinner.
Men love home-cooked food. It's refreshing for them. With you making it for him, he will definitely appreciate the effort. Also, instead of spending time at high-end places all the time, take him away for a long drive in the outskirts, spend some peaceful time away from society, perhaps next to a beach or lake. Go fishing, kayaking, or any of his hobbies; anything that makes you spend some quality time together, without the factors such as money, class, and luxury being a part of it.
No matter how rich a man is, there will be something that makes him feel empty. Normally, it takes a lot of time for a relationship to grow to such a level. You can't force it, it'll happen naturally, and only with time. Try to be an understanding friend, a trustworthy confidant, and if given a chance, try to be that missing piece in his life, with which he feels complete. This happens to be a very deep point; don't try to force it.
For instance, just because he once said that he wants to quit smoking, don't act like a policeman trying to control his life. Affluent men don't like to be controlled, they just want someone to whisper into their ears, "Sweetheart, I'm there with you". If you wish to get the key to his castle, then it is very important for you to get along with his friends and the socialites he hangs out with. Currently, the website has over 1. We surveyed three thousand of these men to find out exactly what a successful man notices first in a woman. Almost all of these qualities were the same as what they notice in job seekers.
Though successful men are not usually so public about their emotions, a bad breakup is seen as a scarlet letter to their circle of friends or colleagues. With that in mind, SeekingArrangement. The fifth most important quality successful men noticed in women was their hair. A man of stature is under constant scrutiny, but also keep in mind that he is likely an alpha male in his own right; running into colleagues or business partners at lunch would prove awkward and deeply embarrassing if he is seen with a moving Hot Topic ad. Keeping hair to a natural hue and focusing on how healthy it looks ups your chances greatly.
After all, hair growth and quality is highly dependent on hormones and nutrition -- an alpha male wants to show that he picked the best out of the dating pool. A sense of self was the fourth on the list.