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Back to Basics: Three Tips to Dating In The 21st Century
How do I know if I am ready for sex? How do I know what my sexual orientation is? Why is it important to get and give consent? The perfect book for helping teen boys understand both themselves and the complexity of the sexual world around them. Paperback , pages. To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.
To ask other readers questions about Dating and Sex , please sign up. Lists with This Book. This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Sep 05, Kate Welsh rated it really liked it Shelves: This guide does a great job of presenting information about healthy relationships, sex, puberty, and more in a friendly and fact-based way. And even though this is aimed at teens, there were a bunch of important po This guide does a great job of presenting information about healthy relationships, sex, puberty, and more in a friendly and fact-based way.
And even though this is aimed at teens, there were a bunch of important points - especially in the discussions of communication and how to build a healthy relationship - that I was tempted to quote to various adults I know. Dec 18, Alice rated it really liked it. This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers.
To view it, click here. I think that this basic information could be particularly useful for someone on the autism spectrum. As I continued to read the book, I decided that if a teen were to use it more as an encyclopedia type resource, looking up topics to read about rather than trying to read straight through, it would be more helpful.
Throughout the first four chapters, I really wish there had been more acknowledgement that not all boys are going to have sex in their teenage years. I give the first four chapters 2 stars. They were hard for me to get through, and I imagine most boys would skim or skip through them. From here on out, I give the book 4.
The chapter did an excellent job presenting legal, emotional, and physical issues to be aware of. There are a couple of points one in this chapter, and one later on I think that ask the reader to consider their religious views and then suggest finding someone to talk to if their religious views do not align with their sexual values.
While I wish the author would have gone into more depth on this topic, I can appreciate his view that it was beyond the scope of the book, and am glad that he at least included as much as he did and encouraged readers to seek out help dealing with religious issues.
As a parent and therapist, having teens make educated and self-aware choices is the goal. Our kids deserve more than to inherit our discomfort. May 11, Make Your Move! Missoula rated it really liked it Shelves: However, when it comes to sex and sexuality, this book is fairly limited. Certain sections are written with a clear directive ie don't call a clitoris a clit. Similarly, important information about safe sex practices stopped after a thorough description of condom use - which means readers of this book have no information about the usefulness of other methods including internal condoms for anal, lube!
Overall, this was a fair primer for young teens but should be supplemented with other materials. Moreover, while the title suggests the guide is for boys, it is important to remember that it is mostly for able bodied cis-gendered boys who identify as straight or gay. Jan 09, Jemma Z rated it really liked it Shelves: This is a great book for a year-old boy to begin understanding how to make adult choices about sex and relationships. I particularly liked the conversation about body image, gender roles, sexual orientation, and consent. Plus, the author does a good job of using actual data to present boys with the truth about the wide range of what constitutes normal.
There are a lot of resources at the end as well. Apr 07, Alice rated it really liked it. Pretty perfect for what we need. Honest, to the point, emphasizes mutual respect and consent. Sep 06, Jay Blevins rated it it was amazing. It is no secret that our society does a miserable job of providing good sex education. That leaves adolescents to try to navigate those areas by learning from friends, movies, television, and other indirect and unreliable sources full of misinformation and mixed messages.
What books there are out there tend to be written for It is no secret that our society does a miserable job of providing good sex education. What books there are out there tend to be written for either girls or both boys and girls. That leaves boys without a resource specifically for them. However, what it does do is give a very thoughtful presentation of the basic concepts and questions that are most relevant to a teen boy.
The book provides a lot of great information. Equally importantly it plants the seeds that there are many factors that need to be considered and thought about beyond what many teens might realize. It provides the basis for teens to think about and seek out more information in those areas.
I appreciate that Smiler takes a very holistic view. He covers more than just the technical steps such as asking someone out, but also thinking about how a relationship my impact your friendships, considering the impact of gender stereotypes, and the role technology plays in both dating and sex.
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He presents a very broad view of sex that counters the problematic societal norm of sex being a goal oriented activity that only includes intercourse. The book goes a long way towards raising awareness that many of our societal norms and expectations fall short around topics such as masculinity, gender roles and stereotypes, being respectful, sexual identity, and sexual orientation.
He even tackles tough topics like sexual assault. The book includes some questions and fun diagrams to help the reader understand and make decisions for themselves. I appreciated that Smiler acknowledged that some issues such as religious conflicts, or a more in-depth discussion of them, are outside of the scope of the book and suggest that the reader should seek other resources to address them.
I know the book is aimed at teen boys. It is written in a style that is easy to read and makes good us of humor. However, my mom was a librarian and had the habit of bringing books home to sit around the house. I very well might have picked it up then. I suspect that this book may make it into the hands of teen boys in indirect ways!
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This book will benefit more than just teen boys. As a therapist that works with adolescents boys I found the book incredibly helpful. It provides not only a wide range of topics to remember, but also frames things in ways that will resonate with teens. I can easily see using the book to support the work I do in therapy. Parents will also benefit from reading this book. It will help them consider all of the different issues that teens may be concerned about or may not even know about. I often see parents have trouble remembering that their teen is not an adult. Besides, if you leave it laying around, who knows who will pick it up and read it!
All in all an excellent resource for teen boys and anyone helping them through their complicated teen years.