Rules of speed dating


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Scoring should be done discreetly between dates while the men are moving around. You may score a date on appearance, conversation and even any kind of immediate spark or attraction that you feel toward your date. Just make sure to write down the name of everyone you see to keep your thoughts organized. While three to five minutes is not much time to delve into deep conversation, it often will yield enough of a first impression so that you can make a judgment on whether or not you and a date would be compatible. However, there are some things that are off-limits to talk about while speed dating.

The first is profession.

How Does Speed Dating Work

This is because too often a dater will make a snap judgment about a person's job without getting to know the real person. You also are not allowed to talk about where you're from, to rule out those who only want to date someone from their own area. The goal of speed dating is to meet as many people as you can to find a match, so talk about interests, or favorite activities, foods or hobbies.

Kay Ireland specializes in health, fitness and lifestyle topics. She is a support worker in the neonatal intensive care and antepartum units of her local hospital and recently became a certified group fitness instructor. The pace in speed dating still gives you time for a nice connection. Participants are asked to register ahead of time to ensure an even ratio between men and women , although some services now offer registration at the door. Inside the venue, speed daters will find that tables are arranged to accommodate two participants at a time.


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One set of the speed daters, usually women, stay seated at the same table, and the opposite group moves from table to table. This table-hopping method has been compared to musical chairs. The difference is, when the bell rings or buzzer sounds, the next seat the dater takes is predetermined. The speed dater progresses from table to table until each participant has had a chance to meet the other.

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Depending on the company, a speed date may last from three to eight minutes, although some go as long as 10 minutes. At the end of the date, each dater makes a note if he or she would like to see the other person again. After that, the speed daters move on to the next table, and a new date begins.

The number of dates held in an evening can vary, but most services hold 10 or less. SpeedDating, the original company organized by Yaacov Deyo, holds seven, seven-minute dates in one event. It was created in by Antony Beilinsohn a Los Angeles based television executive after his Rabbi, Yaacov Deyo, encouraged him to conceive of innovative ways for eligible jewish singles to meet and marry. SpeedDating , as a single word, is a registered trademark of Aish HaTorah.

Speed dating , as two separate words, is often used as a generic term for similar events.

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Usually advance registration is required for speed dating events. Men and women are rotated to meet each other over a series of short "dates" usually lasting from three to eight minutes depending on the organization running the event. At the end of each interval, the organizer rings a bell, clinks a glass, or blows a whistle to signal the participants to move on to the next date.

How Does Speed Dating Work

At the end of the event participants submit to the organizers a list of who they would like to provide their contact information to. If there is a match, contact information is forwarded to both parties. Contact information cannot be traded during the initial meeting, in order to reduce pressure to accept or reject a suitor to his or her face. Requirement for each event vary with the organizer. Specific age range based on gender is a common restriction for events.

Many speed dating events are targeted at particular communities: Some feel that speed dating has some obvious advantages over most other venues for meeting people, such as bars, discotheques , etc.

Speed Dating Advantages

Unlike many bars, a speed dating event will, by necessity, be quiet enough for people to talk comfortably. Participants can come alone without feeling out of place; alternatively it is something that women who like to go out in groups can do together. Because the matching itself happens after the event, people do not feel pressured to select or reject each other in person. On the other hand, feedback and gratification are delayed as participants must wait a day or two for their results to come in.

The time limit ensures that a participant will not be stuck with a boorish match for very long, and prevents participants from monopolizing one another's time. On the other hand, a couple that decides they are incompatible early on will have to sit together for the duration of the round. Most speed dating events match people at random, and participants will meet different "types" that they might not normally talk to in a club. On the other hand, the random matching precludes the various cues, such as eye contact, that people use in bars to preselect each other before chatting them up.

According to the New York Times, participants in speed dating experience an average of 2 in 10 or 3 in 10 matches. Online dating participants, in contrast, only find a compatible match with 1 in or fewer of the profiles they study. While over companies in the US offered speed dating through online registration during the growing of the Internet, between and three large speed dating companies emerged with a national footprint in the US, with events in over 50 US cities: Hurrydate, 8MinuteDating and Pre-Dating.

In the UK, there are two companies that run events in more than twenty cities: Speed Dater and Slow Dating. They were the first to hold Speed Dating Events in Australia in and still operate to this present day.

What are the Speed Dating Rules